Sunday, January 3, 2010

Microsoft and Verizon Deal

Eyewitness account courtesy of ATT handing Verizon's customer Data to the NSA.

V: Durp durp, damn we are low on monies. All those commercials attacking ATT's network left us hung and dry. What do we do's?
M: Hmm we have an extra $500 million lying around what can we do to make more monies?
M: ! idea!
M: Let's expand our search engine market share, I think Verizon needs some monies.

M at Verizon HQ: Hey Verizon sup heard you need monies.
V: OH SHI-! is that Microsoft aka M$ ?
M: Sure is. I have a proposition for you.
V: Proceed....
M: Well we know how you like to lock shit down. We think that's cool and all but how about you grab RIM's ball's with a vice grip and set our uber cool search engine as the default on all the Blackberries you sell?
V: IDK I don't think people will like that very much.
M: (slides $500 million across the table to verizon)
V: Ahh screw our blackberry user's we don't really care about them anyway. (Grabs $500 million)
M: (Mr. Burns. Eggcellent look) I am glad we could work something out Verizon. Remember if you ever need more monies you have my card.

Original Story

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